This is the third installment of our four-part series, exploring four attributes of biblical love that are challenging yet ultimately rewarding in growing our faith and capacity to love like Christ. Our series will cover:
There are many complex and wonderful facets of love, but one that does not receive much attention is the interconnectedness of love and obedience. Why? The human heart often fights against submitting to God or anyone else. We want to prove our independence, our strength, our cleverness. Our own pride often keeps us from experiencing the beautiful aspect of love that arises in the face of true humility.
This pride can be seen from the earliest of ages as children try to test the boundaries set by their parents with disobedience, proving the saying that “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child” (Proverbs 22:15a ESV). Parents who deeply and sincerely love their children want their children to feel safe, loved, and valued. Out of that love, they will set rules, not to control, but to protect and guide them, giving them the boundaries of a safe pasture to explore safely and to flourish.
Children may not fully appreciate this at first, but after experiencing the consequences of their behavior, they learn to obey, not out of fear of punishment but out of trust, believing their parents know what’s best and care deeply for them. Indeed, “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it” (Hebrews 12:11 NIV).
Whereas parents show love for their children by setting rules to live by and disciplining them when they disobey, children’s love is demonstrated not just through words or emotions—it’s shown in their willingness to follow their parents’ guidance. The child’s obedience is a reflection of love, not because they have to obey, but because they want to honor their parents and trust their counsel.
This dynamic is just as true spiritually in our love relationship with Jesus. He makes this connection clear when He says, “If you love me, keep my commandments” (John 14:15, NIV). Jesus himself demonstrated his great love through obedience when He gave his life for us on the cross. In the same way, our love for God deepens as we walk in obedience to him:
“Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves [agape] me. He who loves [agape] me will be loved [agape] by My Father, and I too will love him and show myself to him” (John 14:21, NIV).
“And this is love [agape]: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love [agape]” (2 John 1:6, NIV).
These verses reveal a profound truth:
Obeying God’s commands is not just an obligation but a demonstration of our
love for Christ.
Love fuels obedience, and obedience is often the clearest expression of true love. When these two are combined, they create a powerful spiritual dynamic that exemplifies agape love. This is why we are called to submit to (place ourselves under; be obedient to) one another out of reverence for Christ (Ephesians 5:21). In this way, we walk in humility as Jesus did, submitting his will to God the Father and the Holy Spirit.
The story of Lot’s wife in Genesis 19:1-28 is a tragic example of the consequences of loving the things of this world that can, over time, turn obedient hearts away from God. When the angels urged Lot’s family to flee from the wickedness of Sodom and never look back (v. 17), Lot’s wife disobeyed—her heart clung to the world, and she looked back. The consequence? She became a pillar of salt.
Her story is a stark reminder of the dangers of divided loyalty—loving the world while trying to follow God. This mirrors the warning found in 1 John 2:15-17:
“Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them” (NIV).
Jesus even referenced Lot’s wife in Luke 17:32-33, cautioning his followers:
“Remember Lot’s wife! Whoever tries to keep their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life will preserve it” (NIV).
So, how can we keep our agape love for God pure and not directed at the world’s pleasures? Romans 12:1-2 provides a two-fold answer for us. First, as believers, we are to offer our bodies as a “living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God” (v. 1 NIV). This means daily “dying” to the temptations of the world, the flesh, and the devil as we ask God to set us apart for his good purposes and pleasure. Second, it means not conforming to the world’s mold but being transformed by God’s powerful truth (v. 2) and exchanging fleeting worldly desires for a wholehearted devotion to God. Lot’s wife reminds us that true love for God is shown in obedience—choosing his eternal truths over temporary attachments.
God isn’t looking for robotic obedience or hollow religious acts—He wants a real, heartfelt relationship with his people. He desires steadfast love, sincere worship, and a faith that goes beyond routine to truly knowing him.
In Hosea 6:6, God says, “For I desire steadfast love and not sacrifice, the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings” (ESV). The Israelites were going through the motions of worship—offering sacrifices and following rituals—but their hearts were far from God. Their worship had become empty and mechanical. Yes, they were obedient in their offerings but without love.
Obedience isn’t about restriction—and it’s not about “following the rules” ritualistically. It’s about love in action. Just as Jesus obeyed the Father out of pure love, we are called to follow his commands out of love, not duty. When we truly have laid down our lives for the cause of Christ, obedience becomes a joy, not a burden.
Reflection: Are there areas where your love for God lacks obedience? Take five minutes to journal about how you can deepen your love through greater obedience to his word and his character.
In what ways is God prompting you to exercise greater humility? If you feel comfortable, share your thoughts in the comments!
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